Day 14

I did my second day of Aqua Aerobics. The regular teacher was not there, so they did Aqua Zumba. It was hysterical! It was a good workout, but it was sure funny! Especially compared to what Lindsi does on Saturday mornings. It was still fun and there were a lot of people there. More of the 80-year-old women in the pool. Still had a riot. 

During the last 15 minutes of the class, I had a kind of weird experience. A couple of women got up to leave early and as I looked at them as they walked out… I noticed how big they were. The first thought that hit my mind was "is that what I look like?" It was unnerving to me. It was really kind of deflating. 

I shouldn't be judgmental of someone who looks like that… Especially when I look the way that I do. But it always makes me wonder if people look at me and see the body before they see ME. Yet,  I don't want fear to be a reason for me to lose weight – being afraid of how people see me. It needs to be a healthy outlook on my life, not fear of judgment. 

When I got to my car, I picked up my phone and Googled "fear of fat people".  I wanted to know what the actual term was. The first response was – "Racist". I started laughing so hard, but it was the truth! 

Good learning experience.